Troubled

There are a lot of words that pop into my mind to describe Mary, but "skeptic" isn't usually one of them.

This morning, reading in Luke 1, I came to verses 28 and 29: "The angel went to her and said, 'Greetings, you who are highly favored! The Lord is with you.' Mary was greatly troubled at his words and wondered what kind of greeting this might be." I wonder why she was so skeptical.

On the face of it, that's an awesome greeting. What's wrong with being highly favored, or the Lord being with you? I've always assumed she was troubled because it was an angel - they must be scary, because everyone who saw one was frightened. But that's not what scripture tells us; Luke says she was troubled at his words.

I could understand it after she heard the actual message. "Mary, you're all excited about getting married and setting up your own home and all that, but God has a different plan. How does out-of-wedlock, unplanned pregnancy sound to you?" That's the time to be troubled, but when she hears that part Mary just says, "I am the Lord's servant."

What was there about Gabriel's initial words of greeting that were so troubling? 

Maybe it sounded like mockery. Mary saw herself as a simple village girl, someone relatively low on the prestige scale in her society. She wasn't rich, she wasn't male, she wasn't mature, she wasn't from Jerusalem. In no earthly way was she highly favored.

Maybe there was some kind of connotation with the phrase "The Lord is with you." After all, those words were said to many in Israel's history as they were sent off on adventures (defined as something that, when you're having it, you wish you were home.) Think Gideon and Daniel, for example. Maybe Mary thought, "If he's saying that, he wants me to do something hard."

I'm sure the experts have all kinds of explanations for this verse, but these posts are my unstudied reactions to scripture, and without their help I just don't know why Mary was troubled. But it's a useful question to me because it reminds me of my own reaction to many of God's invitations.

When someone talks to me about an opportunity to partner in ministry, I want to put one hand over my wallet. "Use your gifts," can easily sound like "I can't get anyone else to do this." Ask me to read in church, and I wonder if I'll end up having to sing and dance. To be fair, with Janie that last one is warranted, but the rest are just examples of my own skepticism.

Skepticism is the opposite of trust. Mary responded well to the hard part of the message because she knew who it came from, and she trusted God. She may have been troubled at first because she didn't trust a stranger. I get skeptical when I think I need to watch out for myself; that should never be the case with God.