Job repents

This morning, I face yet another way that Job is a better man than I am. Job repented. 

Job 42:1-6: “Then Job replied to the Lord: ‘I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted. You asked, “Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?” Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know. You said, “Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, and you shall answer me.” My ears had heard of you

but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes."

I often despise myself, but I struggle to truly repent. I’m more of a “yeah, but” guy. Yes, Lord, I cursed that man but did you see what he did to me? Yes, Lord, I judged that person but look at her! Yes, dear, I know I’m late but . . . . 

How hard it is to just say, “I was wrong! What I did was sin! I have no excuses. I could have done right, but I intentionally did wrong. Please forgive me!”

I often think I’ve repented, but the way I know I haven’t really is that I repeat the same sin. I think that true repentance would involve aversion to the sin, or at least determination to leave it behind. I know sin is a struggle, but repentance should be more than just being sorry about a consequence.

Because of that, I frequently pray that God will show me what my sin looks like to him. I pray that God will show me what it looks like to the people involved. I pray that he will help me to hate my sin as much as he does. And then I pray for strength not to sin again.

So what does it mean when I pray all of that but don’t give up the sin? Probably that I’m not praying enough. I don’t expect ever to be sin-free while I’m here on earth. I do think that I will sin less and less, as I become more and more attuned to God. Maybe instead of focusing on the sin, I need to focus more on the Savior.