Common good

Paul won't leave me alone; he keeps chipping away at my self-centeredness.

This morning, in 1 Cor 12:7-11, I read this: "Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit the message of wisdom, to another the message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit, to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, to another miraculous powers, to another prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different kinds of tongues, and to still another the interpretation of tongues. All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he gives them to each one, just as he determines."

What? All these gifts are for the common good?

I'd prefer to think that my gifts are for my own good. My gifts should help me get ahead in life; they should help me compete against my peers for advancement, to win in the marketplace, to gain me recognition in my community and prestige in my church. It's a dog-eat-dog world out there, after all, and my gifts are all I have to give me an edge.

As for other people's gifts, I like it when those are for my benefit too. I guess I don't mind sharing a little bit, but for the most part, if you could please perform music I like, and be interesting and not to long when you preach, and serve causes that I like, and teach things I want to push, that's best. And those gifts I don't understand, the ones that make me uncomfortable, like prophesying and speaking in tongues? Those are just too weird for me, so could you go use them for someone else's good in someone else's church?

In my head, I get Paul's point: God gifts us because other believers need what we can provide with our gifts. It's his way of making sure churches have everything they need to work and live obediently to Him. There should be no hint of self in it.

That doesn't let me be the center of the universe, though. Which is why I struggle with it.